You're pretty when you're petulant. It makes me want to buy you ice cream and tell you it'll be better soon.

I must refrain from excess ice cream, as it will make me fat(ter). But I appreciate the thought.

Fortunately for me, I have a pair of very patient boyfriends who humor me when I'm cranky and will pat me on the head until I feel better when I get home...

I dunno, sounds like something is functioning in your life. Two somethings, even.

On behalf of all the non-working things in the universe, of which I am increasingly one: No.

I kind of expected that answer. But I had to ask anyway.

(nods) We understand... we just figured a prompt response was the least we could do.

No, it's more than you could have done. You could have waited.