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let's start a war, start a nuclear war [Feb. 10th, 2009|11:09 pm]
On Sunday, saintpookie went off to play minis with Jeff & Thomas, and I went to the Wrangler with kung_fu_monkey and coloskind.

The Wrangler, for those who may not know, is a gay bar.

You can probably guess all the rest of the relevant details from the name.

I haven't been to a gay bar since I was in grad school, when I went to the Yard of Ale in Boulder a few times. It was a dinky little bar in a strip mall, with a mixed college-town kind of crowd, and it closed down a couple years ago. It was... okay.

It's a very different experience going to such a place being in a relationship and with people than single and on your own. No pressure to try and meet people, you can just hang out and chat and ogle all the eye candy with a smile. And bounce to the music.

It's also kind of weird to be in a space with a LOT of attractive guys and realize that there's no need to think "I wonder if he's...?" Because, yes. He is. They ALL are. Whoa.

It was fun. I met Van/pink_halen and Tye/wyocub, who are lovely guys, and just relaxed. (I got a pretty good mellow-friendly contact high going.) I may not go all that often, but I'll definitely go again.

Next time I will bring earplugs so I can stand next to the speakers and dance.

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[User Picture]From: bluebear2
2009-02-11 07:42 am (UTC)
Yeah, I see this happening too. Straight (or perhaps bi-) guys who befriend fag hags and then seduce them but claim that they're just experimenting. The women think that it's okay because they'll be nice guys.
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[User Picture]From: goddessdster
2009-02-11 03:41 pm (UTC)
(thank you)
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From: chaosqueen42
2009-02-11 02:03 pm (UTC)
At least the difference is that if you hit on somebody who turns out not to be gay, he can't pull the "WHAT? Why would you think I was LIKE THAT?" crap on you. Because, you thought he was LIKE THAT because he's in a gay bar, duh.

Of course, fag hags can get hit on by lesbians in gay bars. (Are there still mixed gay bars in Denver, or have we become so cosmopolitan that the boys and girls have their own spaces now?) That happened to me a couple of times, and I was so surprised I didn't even figure it out until later. "What? Oh, is that why she kept just talking to me and ignoring my friends?"
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[User Picture]From: dr_tectonic
2009-02-11 03:52 pm (UTC)
That's much less the case in this instance. Very few women patronize the Wrangler.

(There was a small group of six to eight mixed-gender straight kids who were clearly playing tourist, but everyone pretty much ignored them.)

And as chaosqueen42 indicated, it's being able to flip the default assumption that really makes the atmosphere different, whether or not it always pans out...
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[User Picture]From: goddessdster
2009-02-11 03:00 pm (UTC)
New Orleans is, of course, awash in gay bars. So I've spent more than a few evenings in them. Each has its own personality that has grown over the years ("the party bar," "the hang out and hook up bar," "the oldtimers bar," etc), so my usually mixed straight and gay group of friends would decide ahead of time which we felt like. I really liked the oltimers bar. I swear I met a guy there who knew Tennessee Williams.
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[User Picture]From: ng_nighthawk
2009-02-11 03:07 pm (UTC)
As a married straight guy, I think it'd be a bit misleading for me to go to a gay bar. But I pass by the Wrangler on my way to church every week.


So I've been curious--is it a country-western gay bar? Or is it just the Wrangler because we're in Denver, but in reality there are no Brokeback Mountain 2 casting calls there?
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[User Picture]From: dr_tectonic
2009-02-11 03:31 pm (UTC)
There were, in fact, actual cowboys (the Colorado Gay Rodeo Association) pouring beer on Sunday, but I'd say they were in the minority.

I think it may have started out with a country-western vibe, but has evolved into a more general blue-collar / jock / 'regular guy' / bear kind of place.
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[User Picture]From: coloskind
2009-02-11 04:56 pm (UTC)
I personally had a great time seeing you in a different light. I was worried you would have a miserable time, and I would be banished from your household.

I can’t wait to see you get your FULL grove on!!
( btw nice new icon pic )
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[User Picture]From: backrubbear
2009-02-12 04:31 am (UTC)
Ah... to have a place to go dancing...
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