?

Log in

No account? Create an account
JSN - The Mad Schemes of Dr. Tectonic [entries|archive|friends|userinfo]
Beemer

[ userinfo | livejournal userinfo ]
[ archive | journal archive ]

JSN [Mar. 28th, 2011|06:35 am]
Beemer
With regard to the whole Dragon Age II thing where some gamer was complaining about being hit on by a male NPC, and a developer said (awesomely), "get over it", I thought this was a very interesting analysis as to why Joe Random Hetero Gamer might find that uncomfortable enough to complain about:

Boys don't know how to say no (to sex)
LinkReply

Comments:
[User Picture]From: navrins
2011-03-28 12:46 pm (UTC)
Huh. Intellectually, looking at it from the outside as a puzzle having nothing to do with me or anybody I know, that makes a lot of sense and seems to fit a lot of data in a way that nothing else quite seems to do. Intuitively, it makes no sense at all and feels like it was written by an alien who was given some data about humans (by which I of course mean Americans) but has never actually observed any, let alone been one.

Which tells me nothing about its accuracy, but is interesting.
(Reply) (Thread)
[User Picture]From: dpolicar
2011-03-28 01:52 pm (UTC)
Huh.

Interesting.

If you're motivated at some point to express what was alien (or alienating) about the author's perspective, I'd be interested.
(Reply) (Parent) (Thread)
[User Picture]From: navrins
2011-03-29 01:32 am (UTC)
Not alienating, or even alien... it just doesn't seem to describe any aspect of my experience with which I'm consciously in touch. I think of saying no as primarily an assertiveness thing, and the idea that boys as a category would have in any sense a harder time being assertive than girls do is kind of mind-boggling. Yet, as I said, the logic holds together and fits (at least some subset of) the facts, so I'm not dismissing it out of hand.
(Reply) (Parent) (Thread)
[User Picture]From: dpolicar
2011-03-28 01:51 pm (UTC)
That was pretty awesome. Thanks for the link.
(Reply) (Thread)
[User Picture]From: dr_tectonic
2011-03-29 02:15 am (UTC)
Y'welcome!
(Reply) (Parent) (Thread)
From: orbitalmechanic
2011-03-28 05:31 pm (UTC)
Oh smart!!

(Well, the bit where he said "the women in the audience are nodding" felt a little off--I think "laughing like crazy" would be closer.)
(Reply) (Thread)
[User Picture]From: annlarimer
2011-03-28 08:20 pm (UTC)
Or trying very hard not to shout HOW DO YOU LIKE IT, BUSTER??? HUH???
(Reply) (Parent) (Thread)
[User Picture]From: detailbear
2011-03-28 05:55 pm (UTC)
Somewhere in there is a thread about parents (maybe just fathers?) who never allow even a polite "no" as an answer, and how that feeds into the general cultural expectations of boys' behaviours. There's probably lots about how it also feeds into girls' behaviours, too, but I'm not as in tune to that.
(Reply) (Thread)
[User Picture]From: quirkstreet
2011-03-28 08:34 pm (UTC)
I have an ongoing laboratory of sorts in this regard: I'm in a rock band with a straight guy who has very good progressive social politics in general, and pretty darned good feminist/queer-friendly politics. And he likes attention. So when the two gay guys in the band flirt with him, he enjoys it ... mostly. But there are times when you can see the wheels turning in his mind: "Oh. This is what it's like to get a little more attention from a guy than I'm used to." "Oh, this might be what it's like for a woman to be come on to a little too hard."

We make sure to check in with him occasionally. He's outnumbered ... and less prepared than the average human being (i.e. women, gay guys, and other 'minorities') to deal with it.) Whereas Eric and I are dirty, dirty old men with a lot of experience negotiating consent ... not to mention the privilege and entitlement that comes with being, okay, gay, but also male and white.
(Reply) (Thread)
[User Picture]From: srotu27
2011-03-28 09:11 pm (UTC)
It's a really interesting and thought-provoking perspective. Thanks for sharing!
(Reply) (Thread)
[User Picture]From: dr_tectonic
2011-03-29 02:16 am (UTC)
Yeah, I felt... wiser, I guess, after reading it. Glad you enjoyed it!
(Reply) (Parent) (Thread)
[User Picture]From: mellowtigger
2011-03-29 02:53 am (UTC)
Interesting idea. I like it. Stuff to ponder.
(Reply) (Thread)